DON'T DATE IF YOU ARE NOT READY FOR MARRIAGE

Are you in a relationship or dating someone now when you know you are not ready for marriage? One of the reasons why many people end up in bad marriages is because they started dating at a time they were not ready for marriage; but because they had dated this person for so long, they felt obliged to marry them. Knowing it wasn't what they desired, they prayed and hoped things would get better. Some people are so clueless as to what love and marriage is; thinking once you start experiencing nice feelings for someone it means they are in love, and anyone they fall in love with will automatically become their spouse. This is why many singles fight to hold on to bad relationships, trying all their best to change others, but refusing to change the person they have power to change which is they themselves. The bible says in Matthew 22:14 (MSG) ‘Many get invited; only a few make it". In other words many people will tell you I love you but only a few truly love you. Lots will promise you marriage but only a few will attempt carrying it out. Many see you as a want but a few see you as a need. Many might like your company but a few will enjoy your madness. To have a successful marriage, feelings are not enough; readiness matters. It's like having the needed knowledge to get a job done but lacking the required tools. You only become frustrated at the end of the day. If you like someone, their smiles, look, tribe, profession, it doesn't automatically mean they are your prefect partner therefore you must hook them down else you risk losing them. You can choose to spend all the time with them, just to get married to them in the future, but later realize this wasn't what you wanted or needed. The Marriage journey is not about who you have been with but about who you end up with. As at now, because you are not ready for marriage, your heart doesn't know what it really wants until you are ready. The confusion, pains, frustration set in when you are ready and find what you need but realize you are hooked up with what you don't need. There is a reason why God hid Eve from Adam until he was ready for marriage. So please stop accepting proposals whose outcome you don't know; don't go for fights that you are not prepared for. Don't date anyone when deep within, you know you are not ready for marriage. Don’t let someone who is ready for marriage push you into it, knowing you are not ready. You are the steward of your life and you will surely give an account to your Creator one day. So I plead with you to take full responsibility for every condition in your life including marriage. Learn to say "NO" without explaining yourself. "Yes, each of us will give an account of himself to God" - Romans 14:12 (TLB).

In conclusion "Imagine! His left hand cradling my head, his right arm around my waist! Oh, let me warn you, sisters in Jerusalem: Don’t excite love, don’t stir it up, until the time is ripe—and you’re ready" - Song of Solomon 8:4 (MSG).

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HOW TO HANDLE /MAINTAIN A LONG DISTANCE RELATIONSHIP

Communication BUT not excessive communication - it is unwise to be overdo, sticky and possessive. You don't have to communicate 24 hours a day to keep the relationship going. Many couples thought that they need excess communication, this is not true. It might make things worse. Remember less is more. It is not about spamming - you are only going to exhaust yourselves. It's really testing at the right moment & tugging at the right spots

See it as an opportunity - IF YOU WANT TO LIVE TOGETHER, YOU FIRST NEED TO LEARN HOW TO LIVE APART
view it as a test of your love for each other. As the saying goes, real gold us not afraid of test of fire instead of thinking that this long distance relationship is pulling you two apart, you should believe that through this experience the both of you will be bound together even strong

Set some ground rules - Both of you need to have clear with what you expect of with each other during this period. Set some rules so that one will not do things that will take the other party by surprise. For instance are you two exclusive? Is it alright for the other person to go on date? What Is your commitment level? It is better to be open with each other about all these things to keep the relationship going

Try to communicate regularly & creatively - greet each other good morning and good night everyday, this is a must. On top of that, try to update your partner on your life and it's happening, however mundane some of the things may seem. To up the game, send each other pictures, audio clips, short video from time to time. By putting in this kind of effort, you make the other person feel loved and attended to

Talk dirty with each other  - this simply means be romantic to each other by giving pets names, expressing feelings of each other, open your mouth to say you love him or her, expressing how you always feel when talking to each other, you can even say you want him or her now now.

Do things together - i love this aspect so much. Playing an online games together, watch a documentary on YouTube  or films at the same time, sing to each other on call or video chat, take a walk together outside while video calling each other, go online shopping together  and buy each other gift online too.... Lol. You really have to be creative and spontaneous about it

Make visit to each other - visit are the highlight of every long distance relationship.  After all the waiting and yearning and abstinence, you finally got to meet each other to fulfil all the saying, affections etc. It will be like firework, glitter bombs, confelt, rainbows and butterflies to everyone around

Have a goal in mind - goals like what do we want to achieve at the end of the day? How long are we going to be apart? What about the future? These are the questions you need to ask yourselves. The truth is no couple can be in long distance relationship forever,  eventually we all need to settle down
Stay honest with each other - talk about your feelings of fear, insecurity, jealousy, apathy, whatsoever.  Don't try to deal with things yourself. Be open and honest with each other. Let your partner help you and give you the support you need. It's better to look at the problem during it's initial stage than to only disclose it when it's all too late
Learn how to ask good questions and listen well - This is very important and am good at this. Ask your partner what you need to know, by doing this you will gat to know things about him or her very well. Learn to listen carefully to your partner and good questions.
Learn more about how you both approach conflict - conflict is inevitable in relationship but being in a long distance relationship make managing conflict well even more difficult. Learn some basic conflict management strategies and discuss them with your partner before you find yourself mid-fight

Controlling of jealousy - feeling a little jealous and again is not unusual in long distance relationship. However uncontrolled jealousy can lead to destructive condemnation of suspicion, possessiveness, insecurity, anger and shame. If you are feeling jealous figure out how to control your jealousy before it start to control you. It's not easy but it can be done
Laugh together - it's a great to talk about the deep stuff but make sure you keep it light sometimes too. Share things with each other that can make you laugh together
Keep your parnter in your mind alway - we have all heard the saying " absence can make the heart grow fonder but its also true that absence can make the mind go wander" make sure you have some reminders of your partner around perhaps put their photo on your desktop or tape it to your mirror, drink out
Prayers - i can't forget that prayer is the key to every successful relationship today. Pray together, fast together infact worship together

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BASIC TIPS FOR THE GUY WHO WANTS TO GET MARRIED

Back in the days there was a friend of mine who proposed to the lady he wanted to marry.
He invited a group of friends and made a very dramatic proposal, falling on one knee like Lancelot he looked up at this girl (Boyz 2 Men's "On Bended Knee" was uncoincidentally playing in the background) and pledged his undying love with a little box he handed her.

She was all teary eyed as she opened it and lo and behold she saw and then displayed to all and sundry an engagement ring and the keys to a brand new car.

The "yes" that came out from her mouth in acquiescence must have set new decibel levels as she screamed in excitement and he swept her off her feet while all the girls present were fanning themselves with their hands while simultaneously choking on their emotions at this "romantic display of love".

We could almost literally see Cupid's Arrow in the air.

But I have been around and seen a little, so while everyone (admittedly just the ladies) were trying to catch their breath I was thinking in my head how everything would play out.

Suffice it to say they got married shortly after with pomp and ceremony, but it was the happenstances of the immediate aftermath that interested me.

After the wedding we thought Bros Lancelot would carry his Guinevere to his palace but alas it was straight to his friend's house where he was squatting.

After a few months the creditors showed up to collect the money he borrowed to buy the brand new car, and from that point it was one "gbese" after the other.

As I speak the marriage has been dissolved after years of intractable crises.

It all began by majoring on the minors and minoring on the majors.

I did say when I addressed the ladies yesterday- "spend more time and resources preparing for the marriage than for the wedding."

That piece of advice swings both ways.

There was this other chap that came to see me who was dating a girl I knew, and so she asked him to see me first as he said he wanted to marry her and she trusted my judgment.
As I got talking to him to know the sort of person he was somewhere in our conversation he dropped a shell.

He said "my daddy has not been good to me."

I was first taken aback at how a grown man would use "daddy" so freely in a conversation but I took it in and asked just how his "daddy" had not been good to him.

He replied that his father hadn't sent him money for his upkeep in a while.

I asked him how old he was and he said "27 years old".

It took me all my willpower not to unload my mind on him, so all I asked was, "At your age is your dad meant to be sending you money or are you meant to be sending him money?"

I continued "Do you realise Gowon was just 2 or so years older than you when he became Head of State? You want your daddy to send you money for upkeep at 27 but you have already grabbed someone's daughter"

At that I promptly sent him away .

Guys listen, if you want to get married you must remember some basic things.

You must first have discovered your identity and gotten a sense of purpose before you take someone's daughter to the altar.

The Bible calls the woman a "help" for the man.
Have you ever heard of anyone who helps another person do nothing?

You have no business going to marry a woman when you have not defined your direction in life.

You should think beyond the rotundity of her posterior and the perkiness of her anterior before you get married.

Get ahold of yourself and put your life in order before looking for a life companion.
If you don't know where you are headed to how can you take someone else on the journey?

Get accommodation before you get a wife.
Adam had the Garden of Eden before Eve showed up so don't take someone's child to go squat somewhere.

And most importantly, get a J-O-B. No matter how small.

Get a source of income and stop telling us only about your character and what you intend to accomplish.
Get up and do something, mere intentions are insufficient. Nobody builds a reputation on what he intends to do.

Before you talk about getting married make sure you can put food on the table.
Especially for our Christian men  out there, stop telling us how much character you have.

Character doesn't pay the bills, and unless you intend to feed your family with the fruit of the Spirit it also cannot fill hungry stomachs.

Get wise and get cracking.

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MARRY A WIFE NOT A VIRGIN

Some guys think virginity makes a good wife. Virginity is a pride to a woman. After your first copulation, it will exist no more. So don't marry because she is a virgin, marry because she's a wife . A good wife,is a crown of the husband. Seek that good wife. Womanhood is a cycle: daughter to wife to mother. Any lady who fails as a daughter is a mistake for a wife. Because a lady is trained as a daughter to become the crown of her husband. Marrying a virgin is a pride but it does not guarantee successful marriage. Seek the good qualities that make a woman a wife. To those of u guy who are single, find a wife, I mean a good wife. Don't ruin your marriage for the want of a virgin.
#virginity does not guarantee a successful marriage.... And for the virgins acquire the good Qualities of a wife, don't make that pride you kept so long to the last day become a waste.

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O Lord, Where is Mr Perfect?

“I am really tired of praying to God”

“Hey, don’t say that, Susan!”

“I will say it again and again.”

“But why? You are beautiful, you are active in church and everything seems to be going on well.”

“Na beauty I go chop?” Beautiful and yet husbandless at thirty-five?”

“God has a man for you”

“Where is the man? And when will the man come?”

“Just be patient and be prayerful.”

“Shebi, you are already married, cooling off in your husbands home, with a romantic six-packed man to rest your naughty head on every night, while I am speaking in tongues alone on cold nights with no one in sight”

“Sister Susan!”

“Sister Joy!”

“What about Brother David?”

“It is you that will marry Brother David!”

“Ah! What happened to Brother David?”

“You came to church this morning in a Toyota Lexus right?”

“Yes”

“So, I should go and marry Brother David so that I can improve on all the trekking I have done in the last thirty-five years? So that my name can enter Guinness Book of Record for The trekker of all times, abi?”

"Ha!"

"You no know say the trek wey I don trek for this world, e no get part 2?"

“You can make somebody laugh”

“How will you not laugh?” Please, don’t talk about Brother David o?”

“But my husband didn't have a car when we married.”

“I don’t have that patience.”

“Ok, what about Brother Godwin? He asked you out and he has a car?

“That one? That bush man? He cannot even pronounce the name of his car well. He is out of it.”

“Brother James also asked you out. That one nko ?”

“Brother James is too spiritual for me. He doesn't know more than quoting Bible and praying in the Holy Ghost. I am not sure I will ever get to see a movie if I marry him.”

“Tee Boy also asked you out. He is not as spiritual.”

“Ah, that choir boy who has toasted every lady in church? He is too carnal for me.”

”What about Deacon Joshua, you said he asked you out as well?

“That one doesn't have money joor” Is it only preaching we will be eating after marriage?”

“Uhmmm…”Who else asked you out?”

“Brother Tomi, he is too short."

“But it is not in heights?”

“Why is your own husband tall?”

“Susan!”

“Brother Bode also asked me out, but his mouth is too sharp, he talks too much like somebody that has mouth diarrhoea!” Brother Tola is too tall, and he is bent over like somebody that is sick. I cannot marry him.” Brother Chiefo is too old for me. He is nearly forty-five. I am not sure if he is a real man.

Brother Sanmi is too busy with playing keyboard. He will not have time for me. Brother Bubu is okay but the way he smiles reminds me of my primary school teacher that nearly killed me with beating. Mr. Tony is an ideal man, but the way I see him, he will turn me into a housewife. Brother Steve said he wants to become a pastor, I cannot marry a pastor.

Brother Faith seems to like women a lot, I cannot be competing with other ladies in my matrimonial home. Brother Eze is okay, but his bow leg is a concern. Mr. Smith would have been it, but the way he walks like a village man will not befit my destiny. Brother Love is too dark, like God forgot him in the oven or something like that. Mr. Scoot is too light, if both of us are light, will our children not become albinos? And Mr…..”

“It’s okay. I have heard enough.”

“They are still many o…”

“I have heard enough to make my conclusions.”

“What are your conclusions, Madam teacher!”

“You are not ready for marriage!”

“How can you say that? With all my prayer and vigils?”

“You are looking for the perfect man. You will never get one.”

“Are you not the people that say we should not marry an unbeliever or just anybody?”

“Are all these people you mentioned unbelievers?” You see, Mr-perfect does not exist!”

“So, what should I pray for?”

“Pray for God’s will. Pray for God’s perfect will for you. God’s perfect will is not always a Mr. Prefect!”

“What if he doesn't look handsome enough?”

“What if he looks dashing and handsome and after wedding, after you have fed him well, he departs from your definition of handsome and six packs become six months pregnancy? Will you divorce him?”
“So, how do I choose now?”

“First, know that God will never lead you wrong.”

“Secondly, it is only God that knows the one you will love now and will still love in another fifty years.”

“Thirdly, your brain is not designed to know the best spouse for you, Only God can help you decide who is the best person that is not only physically dashing but also spiritually prepared for your destiny.”

“Fourthly, stop looking for inadequacies, look out for God’s direction.”

“Fifthly, if he is born again and filled with the Holy Spirit, with no character flaws or habitual sins, the only thing that remains is God’s leading.”

“So, ask God to lead you. Ask him to help you. Ask for the leading of the Holy Spirit. He is the helper. He knows the best for you.”

“Wow!”

“Stop using your brain to judge!”

“What if God shows someone to me and he is not physically attractive?”

“God is intelligent. He is not an author of confusion. God is love and He will never lead you to someone you hate and loathe. On the contrary, it is your feelings that can deceive you that you are in love with someone that you will really hate tomorrow!”

“I understand now! "

“So I could have missed my man?”

“Possibly, but all hope is not lost. You just need to get back in God, trust His direction and He will have mercy on you! “

"But in all of these, know that an unbeliever or a believer with habitual sins/character issues is a no-go-area.”

"Thanks Joy! I'm blessed!"

"I pray that God will lead you indeed!"

CONFESSION FOR THE DAY
I am led of God

PRAYER FOR THE DAY
Lord, help me to hear you clearly

THOUGHT FOR THE DAY
1 Corinthians 2:9 (KJV)
But as it is written, Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him.

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THE SECRET BEHIND SUCCESSFUL RELATIONSHIP IN THE LORD

INTRODUCTION
God is the author of of relationships. Relationship cut across all areas of our lives. There are certain requirements for relationships based on it's types. It is true that many often fail in their relationships. So, we want to uncover the secrets behind a successful relationship between a bachelor and a spinster who are looking up to marriage.

DEFINITION
1. Secret simply means, "knowledge that is hidden and intended to be kept hidden" We have to leak the secrets today!
2. Successful means, " resulting in success, assuring, or primitive of, success, accomplishing what was proposed, having the desired effect, prosperous, furtunate, happ"
3. Relationship means, " connection or association, the condition of being related."
4. 'in the Lord': A careful study of the use of this adverbial phrase in the Bible means according to the Lord's ( Christ's) teaching. See 1Cor. 7:39, Eph 6:1, Col.3:18.
Therefore, we are discussing the secrets behind successful relationship according to the teachings of Jesus Christ.

Key tips to think deeply on
- Relationship is not for children, but for adult of marriageable age.
- Any child who dabbles into a relationship before time will surely get hurt.
- When the purpose of a thing is not known, abuse is inevitable.
- Insanity is doing a thing the same way and expecting a different result.

SECRETS TO SUCCESSFUL RELATIONSHIP FOLLOWS:

KNOW YOURSELF
You must take your time to discover who you really are. You must know your temperament. Your must know your strengths and weaknesses. Know your medical status. You may need the  counsel of a psychologist and a medical doctor. A good knowledge of yourself is needed before thinking of having a partner.

GET A VISION
Vision is "an idea or goal towards which one aspires". You must have a vision for your life. You can't move like the waves of the sea to just anywhere. You must become visionary. This means having vision or foresight. Someone with a vision is one having positive ideas about his or her future. A visionary person is goals oriented, ambitious, objective, purposeful and also aspires for the best. If you are a man of vision, you attract a lot of sisters. Then, it becomes easy to choose. Sisters want to marry men who have vision in all areas of their lives.

SET  REALISTIC GOALS.
You have to break down your vision into short, medium and long term goals. Then pursue them. You must set goal for your intended relationship. It must be legalistic.

BE PRAYERFUL
Prayer is key to success generally. You must constantly pray for your future endeavors. You must start to pray for the kind of relationship and marriage you will like to have before time.

Please note that these points are not necessarily arranged in any particular order.

LOVE GOD AND OBEY HIM.
You must be spiritual minded. You will succeed if your relationship is built upon the solid rock of the word of God. Seek and be among God's people always.

BE PREPARED
There is a saying that goes, " He who fails to plan is planning to fail" You must prepare physically, financially, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, and educationally. If you are a brother, make sure you have a house you live in rented or built, a steady source of income,  etc before seeking to start a relationship. Sisters want to be    sure that you will be able to take good care of all forms of their needs. If you are a sister, do something that earns you money so that you will be able to support your husband. This will gain you respect from your husband. Sisters should not expect their fiance to start paying all their bills while just starting a relationship.

KNOW YOUR PARTNER
It's important for brothers to study their intended partners even before approaching approach them. While the relationship has started. This studies continues.

MIND YOUR APPROACH
Most men don't know how to approach women.   Some brothers are not left out. This is why sisters often times reject them outrightly. Brothers should learn to approach sisters with respect. Don't ask a sister to be your girlfriend, she might just reject you. Ask her to be your Christian sister and a friend. Grow friendship first. Show her love. Tell her you love her. Give her the assurance that the relationship is heading for marriage. Only say what you mean and only mean what you say. Sister wants to be sure that you truly love and really want to marry her. Don't be in a hurry for her to accept to court you. In fact, be the one to tell her to take her time out to think before getting back to you. Be patient for her response. If you don't know how to approach her, let a mature brother or sister do it for you before you come into the picture. First impression matters a lot.

NEVER EXPECT PERFECTION
Only look for a perfect partner if you are one. But if you know you are not perfect, then expect imperfection from your would-be partner. Men should know that God wants them to groom their partners. The grooming starts when in a relationship and continues in marriage. Sisters, know that you can't get Mr right since you are not Miss right. You need someone who loves God and is willing to learn how to overcome his weaknesses. Many sisters are unmarried because of this mistake. Don't be a victim.

COMMUNICATE EFFECTIVELY
Effective communication is the engine that drives a relationship. You must master the art. Poor communication skills will ruin your relationship. Mind what you say, when to say and how to say it to your partner in your relationship. Relationship often starts well, but when there is breakdown in communication, such relationship may hit the rock and may never be revived. Settle differences immediately. Communicate daily and in fact many times in a day.

[20:35, 1/15/2018] ‪+234 816 218 8663‬: 11. LEARN TO APOLOGIZE.
Most men feel too big to say sorry when they are wrong. Some women a r sad also hardened. They consider it belittling themselves if they say sorry. You must learn to apologize always, sometimes even when you are right.

FORGIVE ALWAYS.
If God forgives us of all our sins, how much more we mere mortals. Often times, we refuse to forgive. This endangers our relationships. We must be ready and willing to forgive our partners even before being wronged. Remember, if you don't forgive men their trespasses neither will God forgive you. It means your prayers will be abominable before God. Forgive and keep your relationship alive.

KNOW HOW TO COOK
Both brothers and sisters must master the art of cooking before thinking of going into relationship that is leading to marriage. This is because after marriage, when one is weak, the other who is strong will take care of the weak one. I pity men who don't know how to cook because they will surely eat outside when their wives are not at home. Brothers, sisters want to hear that you can cook for yourself. This makes them feel safe because they know they will need you to do that when they are pregnant or have just given birth. Brothers abandon sisters who cannot cook before marriage. So,  prepare for courtship and marriage by becoming a good cook. In fact the ability to take care of the home generally is needed.  This is because relationship is to be continued in marriage.

ALLOW ROOM FOR PRIVACY
You don't have to intrude into the privacy of your partner always. Allow him or her some privacy. Stop searching his or her phones and questioning him or her about everything. Stop policing him or her. Stop monitoring his or her every movement. You will likely  accuse him or her falsely. This may spell doom for that relationship. Stop constituting yourself to be a private investigator to him or her because this will be interpreted as lack of trust. This has ruined many relationships. Yours should not be next.

KILL PRIDE
Many people are very proud of themselves and their achievements. They look down on others. This often takes over a person's entire being and makes him or her not to see the best in others. Pride is manifest when a person becomes boastful. He or she becomes the centre of reference in almost every discussion. The Bible says that pride goes before a fall. Many sisters have remained unmarried till old age as a result of pride in their lives. They reject and look down on brothers. This brothers do go out and convert women and marry, while sisters remained single. Sisters do this because of their beauty, financial status, social standing, educational qualification, etc. Many sisters who felt victim of pride are regretting it. Don't be the next victim!

BE HUMBLE
Humility attracts honour, respect, favour and friendship. It makes for peace in a relationship. So, wear humility, especially as a sister. One of the things brother look for in a partner is her level of humility. So wear it and let it overwhelm you.

MASTER THE LAW OF SILENCE
The law of silence demands that you have the ability to remain calm in certain situations. You must learn to be quiet sometimes. You need to listen more than you talk. You need to be calculative in your speech. You need to meditate on some things said to you first before you respond. There are sometimes that silence becomes the only answer that guarantees peace. However,  don't ignore your partner when he or she talks to you. You can put a discussion forward until you are ready to handle it. Note that verbal wounds hurt more that literally wounds and takes a longer time to heal. Be careful!

ANTICIPATE TEST
Your partner may decide to test you on a number of issues. They test is geared towards determining whether you are still steadfast to your promise to him or her. It might be to determine what kind of husband or wife you will be when both of you gets married. It might be to see how much you love God. It might be to determine what you really want from him or her. Think we'll first, before you respond to questions or demands that seem tempting. If you are not careful, you will fail his or her test because it will come to you as a surprise. Be alert. Anticipate them before they come. If you fail, he or she may feel you are unserious and may leave you.

LOVE YOUR FAMILY
If you are a man, love your family members, especially your mother. If you love your mother you will be able to love your wife. If you are a woman, love your family members, especially your father. If you love your father, you will be able to love your fiance and your husband later.

LEARN THE ART OF GIVING
You must learn to give, give and give. Step expecting and collecting all the time. Men generally don't like women who are too demanding. So,  find something to do so you can support your partner.

DON'T DOUBLE DATE
There are some brothers who go out with two to fours sisters promising to marry them. There are also many sisters who do same. There are some sisters who promise to marry one brother whereas are still going out with others and collecting things from others. At the long run, all may disappoint her, perhaps after messing her up. Stick to one person and be committed to the relationship.

APPRECIATE
Always appreciate one another. When your partner does something good to you, don't fail to say thank you. Even though it is very small favour, still appreciate. This will attract more love, peace and care to you. It strengthens the relationship.

HAVE SENSE OF HUMOUR
Women generally get attracted to humorous men. Brothers, make sure you joke at times to create a happy atmosphere for proper communication. Humorous people     are very interesting people. So,  try to be one.

BE ROMANTIC
Brother, learn to tell your fiancee that she is beautiful, tell her she has lovely eyes, tell her she has lovely voice, tell her that her hair or dress is beautiful. Tell her that she is always neat. Tell her all the sweetest things she likes to hear. Above all, tell her that you love her and that she is the best thing that has ever happen to you. Mention that you can't trade her for another. Buy her surprise gifts, most especially what she likes. If you fail to do these things, be sure that an unbeliever will do them and before you know it, she will fall for it. Women easily get  carried away by those sweet words. Sisters, brothers also want to hear you speak sweetly to them. You violate no scripture for saying these things to make one another happy. You only master the art of making one another happy.

LEARN TO SAY NO TO SEXUAL IMMORALITY
Know that sexual immorality is a very serious sin before man and God. Abstinence is the key. Flee fornication ( 1Cor. 6:18). Never visit your partner in secret. Never kiss your partner. Never engage in romance. Don't have sex with him or her till after marriage. Flee anyone who encourages you to. Note that your partner is flesh and blood and that there is the possibility of falling into sin. So, be cautious. Don't ever give room for it to happen. Always make it a law never to have sex before marriage right from the beginning of your courtship and follow that resolve passionately. It is possible to abstain. You can.

LOOK GOOD ALWAYS
Eat well.
Make every possible effort to look good. Your appearance matters a great deal. Your appearance attracts either decent or indecent suitors. If in a relationship already, dress fine. Maintain nice hair style. If possible, find out what hair style, dresses and shoes your partner wants to see you in. Remember that in a relationship, you do things to please one another. However, you must not violate God's commands to please any mortal being.

VISIT ONLY WHEN NECESSARY
You don't have to visit often. Visit in company of fellow Christians. Visit only when expected. Brothers shouldn't just go to a sister's house. Sister will misinterpret your intent. Some families don't want their female children to be visited by any man. They tell their female children that they shouldn't introduce a boyfriend to them. They should only introduce the would-be husband. That means they have to be sure before receiving anything from anyone. So, visit only when you have the approval of the sister and her parents. You can see and talk about your relationship in the church or in the open places.

SPEND TIME OUT TOGETHER
As your relationship is moving on fine, create time to take your partner out. You can visit the cinema, bar beach, fast food, etc. I'm not talking about boyfriend or girlfriend here. I'm  discussing serious relationship that is heating marriage soon. Which means family members had given approval to it. Brother, if you don't take your fiancee out, an hour unbeliever will do it and you loose her. Women love good things. They want to be in good places. Sister, you can tell your fiance to take you out. You violate no scripture by doing these things for happiness in your relationship. Get wisdom!

BE COMMITTED TO YOUR PARTNER
Being committed to your partner means you love him or her truly. It means you stay true to him or her. It implies faithfulness. It means loyalty to one another. It means you are content with him or her. It means you give no room for relationship destroyers. You give no room to snatchers. Never play over the intelligence of one another by double dating. Get some senses!

DON'T BE AN IMPOSTOR
Some men play to the gallery just to get women. They tell them all sorts of lies to get them. Once they get them, they start manifesting who they really are. Unfortunately, some brothers follow suit. They deceive sisters by parading themselves to be who they aren't. Some sisters do same. Stop being an hypocrite. Be truthful. Be honest. Don't give someone a false hope.

BE OPEN WITH YOUR FINANCE
Brother, don't hide your financial status. Let your partner know your income and expenditure items. Sister, open up to your fiance. Openness creates trust. It makes partners plan their lives better. Remember in a relationship, the partners start to think alike, act alike, plan for the rest of their lives together. Relationship quickly translates into marriage when issues of finance are kept open. So,  open up today!

LET YOUR PARTNER KNOW YOUR INDEBTEDNESS
You must not live on credit and yet live in pretence. Let him or her know who owes you and who you owe as well as the amount. This will help you to succeed in your relationship. Sudden discovery of this can pose threat to the success of your relationship. So,  stop pretending!

LET YOUR EX BE EX
Many Christians pretend to be saints. They start relationship when they suppose not. Some do it as a result of lust. These and many factors often lead to break up. Some times the offended partner in the relationship feels so cheated and deceived. This often affects new relationship that should result in marriage. To overcome the pains in the heart by an ex party in a relationship, you must first forgive and then allow the person to be in your past. Live that ex to the past. Focus on the present wonderful person God is bringing your way. Don't allow the pains of the past to make you feel bad and treat the innocent partner as your ex. Never go back to your ex because the later disappointment may be worst than the previous one. Note: "Once beaten, twice beaten."

KILL WORLDLINESS
Many Christians youths are as worldly as unbelievers. In terms of music, dressing, lifestyle,etc. Things like these affect relationships. It affects sisters most because devoted brothers will not want to court and marry such. Some sisters want to marry a man who lives in a nice flat, has a car, receives huge monthly salaries, etc while such don't even have anything to support the man with. They often reject good suitors while waiting for their 'ready made husbands". Many sisters with this mindset are already above forty years and are still single. The brothers they rejected left them, got married to other sisters, had children who are graduating from higher institutions. Sisters should not bewitched themselves.  Sisters should be more spiritual minded.

SHOW RESPECT
Learn to respect yourself. Lear to respect your partner. Remember that respect is a reciprocal. Lack of respect can easily cause break up. No man  likes a disrespectful partner for courtship let a lone for marriage.  Many sisters lack respect. They should learn that or get ready for break up. In fact the would-be mother in-law would tell the son not to marry a disrespectful girl to avoid marital problems. So,  sisters, learn to respect.

BE OPTIMISTIC
Many relationships fail from the beginning. This is as a result of inability to let go of past failed relationship. Because of past failures, some sisters feel that the new suitors would also disappoint them. They often say that all men are the same. Sisters, all men are not the same. There are still good ones. Brothers, don't allow past rejection to condition your mind for another failure. Brothers and sisters, always be optimistic. This is the only known way to succeed. Speak faith into your life. Nots: "so you think, so you become"

INVOLVE TRUSTED MARRIED PERSONS IN YOUR RELATIONSHIP
It's true that experience is the best teacher. Before you go into a relationship, consult a relationship expert. Get tips for successful relationship. This will enable you to know what to expect and what to do. Brother, if you can't go hunting, use a trusted expert to hunt for you before being let in to your partner. Both partners need to carry trusted married persons along in their relationship. This will enable you get quality advice that will enable you to succeed.

We have been looking at secrets of successful relationship.
We have considered a lot of tips. Please endeavor to follow them carefully and your relationship will transform into marriage soonest.

Please share with your friends and family if found useful

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STRICTLY FOR MEN ONLY

When a man steals your wife, there is no better revenge than to let him keep her.
~By Lee Majors

After marriage, husband and wife become two sides of a coin; they just can't face each other, but still they stay together.
~By Al Gore

By all means marry. If you get a good wife, you'll be happy. If you get a bad one, you'll become a philosopher.
~By Socrates

Woman inspires us to great things and prevents us from achieving them.
~By Mike Tyson

The great question... which I have not been able to answer... is, "What does a woman want?
~By George Clooney

I had some words with my wife, and she had some paragraphs with me.
~By Bill Clinton

"Some people ask the secret of our long marriage. We take time to go to a restaurant two times a week. A little candlelight, dinner, soft music and dancing. She goes on Tuesdays, I go on Fridays."
~By George W. Bush

"I don't worry about terrorism. I was married for two years."
~By Rudy Giuliani

"There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage."
~By Michael Jordan

"I've had bad luck with all my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn’t.” The third gave me more children!
~By Donald Trump

Two secrets to keep your marriage brimming
1. Whenever you're wrong, admit it,
2. Whenever you're right, shut up.
~By Shaquille O’Neal

The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once...
~By Kobe Bryant

You know what I did before I married? Anything I wanted to.
~By David Hasselhoff

My wife and I were happy for twenty years. Then we met.
~By Alec Baldwin

A good wife always forgives her husband when she's wrong.
~By Barack Obama

Marriage is the only war where one sleeps with the enemy.
~By Tommy Lee

A man inserted an 'ad' in the classifieds: "Wife wanted". Next day he received a hundred letters.
They all said the same thing: "You can have mine."
~By Brad Pitt

First Guy (proudly): "My wife's an angel!"
Second Guy : "You're lucky, mine's still alive."
~ By Jimmy Kimmel

“Honey, what happened to ‘ladies first’?” Husband replies, “That’s the reason why the world’s a mess today, because a lady went first!”
~By David Letterman

“First there’s the promise ring, then the engagement ring, then the wedding ring...soon after....comes SuffeRing!
~By Jay Leno

"The reason why wives live longer is because they don't have a Wife"
~By Brandon Breezy

Share this to all the men to give them a good laugh .......and to the ladies with good sense of humour who can handle it!!!!!!!

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